In Search of...

some energy! Since my latest fibro flare, I have been doing everything I can to bring my pain levels down to "normal" and am not having to take the strong pain meds any more. This is a good thing. Well, I've had a migraine for 2 days now but it too is settling down.

I am just yearning for some energy. I have so many things I want to do, that I need to do - and it is sooo frustrating to not even do the simplest things.

We have had very rainy weather for the past 10 days. As a result, the entry badly needed to be mopped. It has been bothering me for days, but today I finally decided I could do it. After I vacuumed and Swiffer-jet-mopped the little area, I had to lay down because I was wiped out. Damn.

Next Friday, I go back to the sleep doctor to obtain the results of my sleep study. Originally I was hopeful that they would put me on the CPAP machine and I would finally sleep well and be well-oxygenated, which would help with this fatigue thing. Since I "didn't meet the criteria"for them to put me on the CPAP machine halfway through the night (as originally planned) and since they told me not to come back for the second study, I am afraid they think I don't have sleep apnea and have a different kind of problem.

I was actually feeling pretty good about the CPAP thing, because it was a treatment that was NOT a pill. I feel like a walking pharmacy and I hate it. As a matter of fact, I am trying again to get off the Prevacid I've been taking for reflux. I had successfully stopped it before, but I started taking it again when my gall bladder was acting up (before I knew the symptoms were from the GB). I kept taking it after the surgery because I thought my digestive system had been through enough trauma, I didn't want to disturb it further.

My reasoning for wanting to get off this particular med is that it reduces/stops the production of stomach acid. Well, we have that acid for a reason - to digest food. Digestion of food is what enables our bodies to convert carbs, proteins, and fats into energy for our cells to use. My nutrition doctor had explained this to me, and it makes sense.

Well, coming off this kind of med sometimes causes a rebound effect, where the stomach acid production goes overboard for a while until it gets back to normal. That has made the past 2 weeks a lot of *burp, gag* fun. I am controlling it by being very careful about what I eat, and it seems to be improving.

I am also on meds for cholesterol and triglycerides, which finally are in the normal range, but I worry about long-term use. My goal is to use diet and exercise to control them and get off the meds.

Of course, maintaining a diet and exercise regimen requires energy, to plan, shop, cook, work out, etc. Energy I don't have. But if I could do it, my energy levels would improve.

I'm just frustrated right now. I am making small changes again, but I've made these changes before and not kept them up when the fibro/CFIDS flares up. How many times can I start over? Will I ever be able to keep it up? My track record is pretty poor.

Poor George gets a bit frustrated with me and for me, and I can't blame him. I know what to do.....

Just Do It.

It sounds so simple.

But the disease makes it so hard.